My Perception on Tolerance

Tolerance is bouncing back even when you are thrown against a very hard wall. A square can't bounce because it's made of straight lines, but a ball can because it’s round and usually light. This life is all there is and so we may as well aim for our goals directly, with no largeness or beauty. And the corners of the square the sudden changes of direction, can hurt people, one doesn't associate a ball with hurting, but with playing a game.

How is it possible to have tolerance in a splendid way, as a virtue rather than a necessity?

One has to Love quiet, and over and over again, make a silent journey inside oneself.........

This brings such a beauty in you that, though ugliness and problems are seen they are fairly integrated into design, they give a contrast.

Then love people, not in all a superficial way but also as who have an intricate design of experience inside. 

When you start looking into people’s eyes and see their rarity and meet your rarity too, then TOLERANCE becomes easy. It is an expression of your respect for quality, for keeping life OUTSTANDING.

Where there is no tolerance, everything becomes ordinary. It's like standing on the edge of things and sullen.

Tolerance is saying yes to the game and enjoying it...........

I'm reading: My Perception on Tolerance

Understand the State Of Mind

Until the moment you understand your state of mind, how it creates rule, you will not stop BLAMING other people or situations for your failures in your life. It is your own thoughts and feelings in a particular situation that forced you to take decisions, which has messed up your future OR say destiny. In addition, you are well aware of your real, inner personality. No one knows you better than you. Not even the GOD who created you nor your mother who bought you in this world. It is only you who knows the real YOU. You are aware that the externals are not the causes and conditioners of your life and your experiences. Carrying a thought process that others can or have spoilt your happiness, your peace of mind, OR cheated you and left you no where in your life or in your carrier and you being innocent or helpless became the victim like a football from this square to that, feels you must combat and fight on others for survival and that is the right way to deal with – All these ideas expose their destructive personality, and when you understand that thoughts are the things that creates the feelings...

Thought + Feelings = Decisions è Destiny “A man is a model of his thoughts”--- Vahini

“ For as a man thinketh in his heart, so he is.”  PROVERBS 23: 7

Then, how do you understand yourself, others and situations around?

To start and develop understanding, one have to forgive and forget others mistakes and situations. No matter how big or small the situation or person is.

Most of the times in my trainings and counseling, I come across to people who says: Of course, we forgive and forget others mistakes or else it would be difficult to move on in life…. You won’t believe want kind of situations we have come across? You can even imagine…. And so on…

It is highly appreciable if they have forgive and forgot…

AND, How does one knows that they have really forgiven the person who has disturbed, by putting you in worst situations which resulted as bad experiences to you? We will do a simple Self-analysis test in my next post, to find out –

• How honest we are when we say we forgive and forget others mistakes?
• Are we true to our self?

Till then… Stay Cool!!!!! 

I'm reading: Understand the State Of Mind

Memory Tips

Certain mental techniques can enhance your ability to remember. Have a go at experimenting with some of the below to see what works best for you.

Acronyms

Create a phrase using the first letter of a series of items you’d like to remember.
For example, to remember to pick up milk, eggs, bread, cereal, Nutella, and avocados, one might create the phrase:
My Entire Book Collection Needs Attention (M.E.B.C.N.A); bizarreness can add to memorability.

Chunking

Breaking down a long series of units into easy-to-remember groupings can make things more manageable and help improve recall. This is the reason why phone numbers are typically grouped into three and four digit units. We suggest this technique for Lumosity’s Monster Garden, Memory Matrix, and Moneycomb exercises; think of clusters of stimuli in terms of what recognizable shapes they make, e.g. “L” or “T” shaped is easier to remember than “three long by two wide”.

Caffeine

In moderation, caffeine can temporarily boost your memory and shorten reaction times. A couple of cups of coffee or a few cups of tea also provide antioxidants for bodily health.

Visualizing

Creating detailed imagery and associations can help with solidifying memories over the long term. The more creative you can get with your imagination, the better: if you meet someone named Nick, perhaps envision him with a white beard and think of him as St. Nick.

Napping

Taking power naps, from 10-20 minutes, can help consolidate memories and learning. Sleeping longer, however, can end up making you groggy.

Memory Jogs

Writing down reminders and strategically placing them in your home, car, and workplace is a good way to jog your memory about important tasks or events.

Brain Training

By strategically exercising your brain it is possible to improve working memory along with other cognitive abilities. This has been shown to be true even late in life.

Enrich Your Environment

Enriching your environment through engaging people, media, and new experiences can improve learning, cognitive reserve and even reinvigorate faded memories. Go on a day trip or work in a volunteer setting!

Catching ZZZZs

Getting enough sleep at night helps consolidate learning and the formation of new memories from the day’s experiences. People typically do best with 7-9 hours a night.

Breathing

Deep, slow breathing can de-activate the “flight or fight” side of your nervous system, protecting the brain from the damaging memory effects of excessive stress.

Hydration

Proper hydration boosts the speed of neuronal firing. Unfortunately, most people are chronically dehydrated, due in large part to the prevalence of alcohol, caffeine, sugar and high protein foods. Eight glasses of water per day is ideal.

Sugar

Consumption of concentrated sugars can spike insulin levels, resulting in fatigue and compromising cognitive functioning. Keeping to complex, instead of simple, carbohydrates helps slow and balance sugar absorption, resulting in more stable energy levels. Complex carbohydrates generally include those in wholegrain form.

Breaking a Sweat

Periodic cardiovascular exercise has been shown to reduce the toxic effects of prolonged stress and stimulate the production of new hippocampal neurons (important for learning and the formation of new memories).

Green Leafies

Vegetables such as kale, collards, chard and spinach have high levels of anti-oxidants which help protect your brain from daily wear and tear.

Dark Chocolate

Eating dark chocolate, the darker the better, also helps protect the brain. This is because chocolate has one of the highest anti-oxidant contents of any food. Keeping it dark minimizes the negative impact of excessive fat and sugar.

Being Social

Engaging people exercises diverse areas of the brain, keeping your cognitive processes active and fit.

Dancing

Dancing is not only a great way to reap the benefits of being social, but it also involves balancing and coordinating movement, all of which are good for your head.

New Languages

Learning a new language pushes the limits of your knowledge and contributes to cognitive reserve. This helps to prevent and slow the effects of mental decline.

Rhyming

Incorporating what you’d like to remember into a rhyme can help with later recall. A common example of this used for plumbing is “righty tighty, lefty loosey”.

Associations

Associating what you’d like to remember with an environment, feeling, or person will help recall on demand. Association is generally used to describe any learning process aside from simple habituation.

Alcohol

Excessive alcohol drinking (more than a couple of drinks per day) has been linked to brain shrinkage and mental decline.

Smoking

Smoking cigarettes constricts the arteries in your brain, limiting available oxygen. The habit has also been correlated with higher risks of stroke and decreased densities of brain gray matter.

Relaxing

Excessive stress can cause brain damage. Your hippocampus (responsible for consolidating new memories) is especially sensitive.

Game Playing

Playing games, whether online or otherwise, can stretch the mind and help build adaptive neural networks.

Rehearsing

Rehearsing new information to yourself, or aloud to others, helps reinforce associated neural networks and learning.

Meditation

Periodically calming and focusing the mind has been shown to help with attention, processing speed, and response times, in addition to relieving stress.

Paying attention

Good attention is the foundation of good memory. Pay special attention next time someone introduces himself, or when you need to remember something else specific, and notice how this affects your later recall.

Source - Luminosity

It has always helped me...hope this will help you too!

Live life with Strength & Passion!!!

Vahini R Muniganti

I'm reading: Memory Tips

As you travel through life there are always those times
When decisions just have to be made,

When the choices are hard, and solutions seem scarce,
And the rain seems to soak your parade.

There are some situations where all you can do
Is simply let go and move on,

Gather your courage and choose a direction
That carries you toward a new dawn.

So pack up your troubles and take a step forward
The process of change can be tough,

But think about all the excitement ahead

There might be adventures you never imagined

Just waiting around the next bend,
And wishes and dreams just about to come true

In ways you can't yet comprehend!

Perhaps you'll find friendships that spring from new things
As you challenge your status quote,

And learn there are so many options in life,

Perhaps you'll go places you never expected

And see things that you've never seen,
Or travel to fabulous, faraway worlds
And wonderful spots in between!

Perhaps you'll find warmth and affection and caring
And somebody special who's there

To help you stay cantered and listen with interest
To stories and feelings you share.

Perhaps you'll find comfort in knowing your friends
Are supportive of all that you do,

And believe that whatever decisions you make,
They'll be the right choices for you.

So keep putting one foot in front of the other,
And taking your life day by day...

There's a brighter tomorrow that's just down the road 

Don't look back! You're not going that way!

I'm reading:

Move On!!

Life is about making the Right decisions and moving on!!!

What's the point of spotting the finger, other than to cut out your own progress in moving on?

When you are hurt by your dear one’s, forgive them for their ignorance and move on…

When you try your best to make up things and they still don’t work, take it as an end of the chapter and move on…

When you work so hard to achieve things and you fail, figure out the gaps in hard work, start with new method and move on…

When you start to abandoning your old beliefs or values... you may be stuck at the threshold for some time. You have to clear away your cherished beliefs and moving on…

When you help someone to grow in life and the same person betray you, smile on the immaturity of that person and move on…

When anyone tires to take advantage of you, show them you are aware of their intentions, keep them at distance and move on…

When you are encountered by negativity that drains you off, Build your inner self, so strong that it doesn’t affect you future and move on…

When you fall to that bottom level, gain the faith and strength on life and raise with double energy to move on...

When you make mistakes, learn out of it, make sure you don’t repeat it again and move on…

When you are suffering is caused by being in a wrong place. If you are unhappy where you are, move on…

 Keep Climbing…

  If you can’t fly, Run…

    If you can’t run, Walk…

      If you can’t walk, Crawl…

        But by all means, keep Moving!!!!

Life is really about Moving On!!!

You are responsible for your life. You can't keep blaming somebody else for your dysfunctions. If you're serious about moving on in your life, all you have to do at this point is be willing to have your path be an Enlightened individual.

Live Life with Strength & Passion!!!

Vahini R Muniganti

I'm reading: Move On!!

Questioning - A Powerful Tool.

What a wonderful gift I got from that Almighty? This very beautiful gift of mine, I will cherish till my last breath… THE LIFE!

A great gift that you can feel, experience, understand, observe, learn, and evolve yourself in every turn of life.

What we can do OR we can’t do…with our life OR in our life, what we feel and consider is impossible for us to accomplish OR quite possible to achieve depends on utility of our own belief system. The gift that can be destroyed OR CAN be Enhanced by our own thoughts. This very belief system not only determines but also affects our thinking pattern and hence forth our behavior. 

It directly or sometimes indirectly affects the way we deal with people or circumstances in our day-to-day lives, that’s why they say; the capabilities are constant but how much of it you use is depended on the identity you have for yourself. 

When in doubtful situation I use the tool of “Questioning” which I found as a powerful tool to track myself on right way.

The belief what we carry for own self depends on the identity we have for our self, i.e. Who am I? OR Who we are? Determines our capacities and capabilities of what we can or cannot. The beliefs we have on our self is so powerful that it can create a great impact on our personal, professional and social aspects either in negative OR in positive way depending on the believes we carry for self.  Our beliefs on own self directly reflect on the self-esteem and the attitude we carry that so forth defines our self Identity.

 As the self-belief operates and reflects on the functioning of our own capabilities…so the questions help us tune our self on right code of strings.

I rediscover myself by questioning as I have experienced the power of this application several times… in past. As a person who practices meditation alone with affirmations, I even realize that the power of questioning is greater than the power of affirming as the questioning acts instantly on the feelings and emotional state we go through at that particular time. 

When we ask the right question, for sure we will get the right answer. If we are expecting a right answer for a wrong question, then our mind leaves us in a state of confusion where we tend to decide on something and then an equal contradictory question / say a doubt arises in us which is opposite to what we have decided to do. That’s where we got to realize that – this is the time to reframe the question, simple because the quality questions create the quality answers. Switching our self to ask a quality question opens new door, better way to deal with situations. 

Remember! That its not merely a question but a link, a tool that is shaping our destiny. So it’s very important to ask right questions.

Why is that we fail to ask right questions sometimes?

To understand this powerful tool of “Questioning,” let me share a real time case study that I have dealt with a few days ago…

In an occasion where we were attending a friend’s marriage, I came across to a cute little baby girl, named Monisha, of 5. While I was comforting myself on a couch, Monisha came to me for the first time with a sweet smile and an innocent face, for which she got a smile back as response from me as I love kids. Then she came close to me with her little fingers making a kind of sign and said something in “Tamil” language, which I am not much familiar of. I can understand few words if spoken slowly but Monisha said something so quickly with a wide smile on her cute face. And after that she astonished me by squeezing my cheeks. I could sense and understand that the little baby said something good. Then I lifted her and made her sit on my laps and asked her few general questions like – what’s your name? Which standard you are studying in? for which she replied back in Tamil with her soft nightingale tone. J People around us got surprised watching us conversing in two different languages that are not understood by each other. Then, there comes the grooms sister who acted as translator, thanks to her, she asked Monisha… do you know her? The kid relied “Yes”. Then she again asked, Monisha did you like her? This time the kid relied out official translator by hugging me and said the same words what she said when she saw me for the first time. I asked my friend, what does it mean? She replied saying; Monisha refers you as a cute little baby. And immediately I got so many kisses from this sweet girl. 

 Everyone around witnessed this entire scenario, including one of my close friends.  My pal joined to us with pleasant feeling and asked Monisha with a big smile, if Vahini is little baby then what am I? Just expecting a friendly reply from this cutie-pie, as Monisha was sounding so sweet while she was talking. Monisha replied something that shocked every one of us, she told my friend that I don’t like you and I won’t be your friend. For which my dear friend got little embarrassed but managed to smile it out. But, somehow this very reaction of Monisha has triggered my friend think on “Why the kid didn’t like me?” 

Since then for next few days whenever she recollected that incidence or whenever she saw a kiddo, my friend questioned me only one thing, why doesn’t kids like me? For which, honestly, I don’t have a convincing answer. But when I was asked similar question again and again, I countered her back with the question – What do you think the reason is? For which the spontaneous answer from my dear friend was “ I Don’t Know.”

That clearly indicated that the question is wrong, as it doesn’t have any right answer!

At that moment the immediate question raised in my mind is that why do people fail to ask right question? How can I help my friend get a right answer? What could be the right/ quality question? They say: ask and you shall receive…the same happened with me. As I was thinking of helping out my friend, I received a solution that I have messages my friend that says – My friend, you asked me “Why doesn’t kids like me? Instead, I suggest you to ask yourself, “How can I condition myself, so that I am more lovable and happy?’

Changing the question changes the state of mind, which in turn changes the thinking pattern of individual. The focus is shifted immediately by asking the right question, forefront, changes our feelings, emotions and behavior. The RAS starts focusing on the right answer by perpetuating the positive thinking pattern.

Asking one self the right questions, like,

what’s really great about my life and myself right now?

Did I achieve and become what I really wanted to?

What id that hindering me in achieving my Goals?

How can I evolve and empower myself in order to achieve what I aim for?

These above questions are very powerful that give us an accurate and quality answers. I personally evaluate myself by asking such powerful questions on New Year and on my birthday every year that happens to fall in every six months respectively. This application helps me to trigger my capabilities and gets me out of that self-contradictory state of mind [doubting self abilities] and empowers me to take up new challenges by stepping off my comfort zone to discover those untouched landscapes of life, to experience those unachieved new objectives.

We must apply this tool of “Questioning” to evaluate when and where required and then execute the answer to turn the concept into reality. The tool of questioning is so powerful that it instantly shifts the focus and shapes the destiny. As they said: Some men see at things as they are and say, why? I dream of things that never were and say: why not? That’s the power of questioning. We can trigger our emotions, shift our focus and apply our capabilities by asking quality questions. And we can experience the magnificent emotional change that empowers our capabilities that helps us in achieve our Goals. 

The holidays are the best phase to rejoice and enjoy with our beloved ones, get in touch and greet our old and new friends and also to spend with us in solitude to encounter our own self with quality questions. To make those powerful, emotional transformations, in our thought process to redesign and shape our better tomorrow.

 As it is already said: We cannot change the past, but we can always change our future.

Live life with Strength and Passion!

Happy Holidays! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!!

Love,

Vahini R Muniganti

I'm reading: Questioning - A Powerful Tool.

Shift the Focus, Change the Perception.

It’s not only about redirecting negative behavior buts also to reinforcing positive behavior.

Given a thought on above sentence that says so much about changing the negative thoughts and perceptions into positive healthy thoughts, that will show a direct impact on human behavior…Its a great step to take and experience on. Bad experiences are part of life as they give us a direction towards better understanding on life. I heard Mr. Mahesh Batt saying that “I will never share my failures with any one, nor I will regret on them as they are my treasures of life. They taught me the right way, so don’t want to give away my failure to any one.”  What a perception he got..! must say…very cerebral.

Now when we are talking about changing negative perception into positive in our self and others… there are few questions rise in my mind, like:

• Can we really change others perception by changing the focus?
• Can we change our own perception into positive way without changing the focus on negative incidences occurred in past?
• If, someone’s external behavior is in positive way but internal perception still holds in negative manner, will this not affect the entire behavior of the person in negative manner?

There are many such questions popping up in mind as I think on deeper levels of perception and understanding personas of human.

For now lets focus on first question.

“Can we really change others perception by changing the focus?”

The answer will be “YES” based on my experiences. As an example I would like to share my own personal experience that I shared to Mr. Aalok Sood, Head of DC India and Arthur F Carmazzi, Founder of DC and top 9^th Leadership Guru in the world, while training the 2^nd batch of DC Trainers in India, as a case study on "Focus and RAS"

Few months ago I have introduces Fluffy [it’s a rabbit, whom I consider as my son. So, I don’t really like to address him as a Rabbit] when he was just two months baby. Knowing the fact that my people are pet lovers.

But, somehow my husband couldn’t connect to him. And felt annoyed with Fluffys presence…and this infuriated nature started bursting out everyday when Fluffy was around him. Even Fluffy sensed it and started behaving weirdly only with my husband. Initially I felt I must give them sometime to adjust and accept each other. But then, even after 4 months I don’t see any change except Fluffy growing big with his naughty stunts. There was a point when my husband started telling me to give away Fluffy to some one else.

Ignoring his words I started recollecting him about his loving nature towards pets, when he pampered Jiya, a pet dog in our family. His caring personality and his future plan of getting a Germen shepherd into family. There his Focus got shifted and started paying attention towards Fluffy. Then I educated my husband on fluffys behavior and how he loves to get pampered. As, Fluffy loves to get pampered a lot. Diverted his focus more on moves of Fluffy when he is hungry, how he is when he wants to play. By shifting the focus from irritation to caring, today I see it’s my husband who feeds fluffy more, cared about the cold weather and comforting Fluffy and to my wonder he started speaking to Fluffy like I do. Harish took an effort of repairing the basket in which Fluffy stays [that was bitten by fluffy to escape J].
I see a dramatic change in Fluff’s behavior as well as he is not troubling Harish by scratching him now days. The Focus and RAS of Fluffy is changing and Perpetuating to Harish focus. Incridible exchange of energies.

Shift the Focus change the Perception. As perception changes the world around us.

Explore- Experience- Evolve- Excel...!

Live Strong with Passion!!
Vahini R Muniganti

I'm reading: Shift the Focus, Change the Perception.